A Beginner's Guide to Escapism

Escapism, n.
Merriam-Webster define it succinctly as "habitual diversion of the mind to purely imaginative activity or entertainment as an escape from reality or routine."
Wikipedia defines it more vividly as "mental diversion by means of entertainment or recreation, as an escape from the perceived unpleasant or banal aspects of daily life. It can also be used as a term to define the actions people take to help relieve persisting feelings of depression or general sadness."

We've got the picture quite clearly by now, haven't we? Escapism, as defined above, is an art in its own right. And an awesome art it is, I tell you! There are a thousand and one ways to practice it, and yet you can never be sure you've done it all. Habitual escapists follow a very simple rule – escape what you can’t change. No matter what the problem, there are always multiple ways to escape it.
I’m referring here to those lords of escapism who have a perfect escapist solution to every problem under the sun. Be it an irksome beau or a hard break-up, bad scores or heavy debt, they can escape it all.

I believe I've never had such an apt idea to write about - something that is so ingrained into most people's existence, and yet hardly ever goes noticed or spoken about. So here’s a beginner’s guide to the most basic of all escapist techniques, compiled and issued in public interest by yours truly - the biggest escapist of all time.

1. Music – the antidote to every ailment of the mind.

Plug yours ears and pretend the world does not exist. That’s what earphones and headphones were made for, weren’t they? To keep out undesired frequencies? Put that to use. Block out all noise, all thoughts. (And all unwanted texts and phone calls too)


2. The Pan Indian Movie Marathon
Drown yourself into an ocean of movies. English, Hindi, Tamil, Korean, Bhojpuri – leave not a single one unwatched. Watch movies as if your life depended upon them. Feast on a movie each for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And before you even realize, you’d be a house of such gross ailments as would literally make you forget what you were trying to escape. Voila! Mission accomplished!

3. Shop, shop, till you drop!
Well, this one’s certainly not for those who are trying to figure out how to settle their infinite debts. Quite the contrary actually. This technique says, shop your way through all troubles. Spend all you have. Spend more than you earn, and more than you’ve saved. Man, will you reap multiple benefits! Your house will be filled with all those items you have always wanted but never needed, and soon you’ll find yourself neck-deep in such shitty debt that all your sorrows would just slink in a corner, feeling dwarfed.

4. Sleep your way through life.
This one’s my personal favorite. Sleep your way through classes; sleep your way through work. Put your phone on silent, keep the landlines away. Once you learn to sleep all day, evidently, you’ll start staying awake at night. And that’s when you can implement #2. Talk about burning the midnight oil. You can even be a daredevil and take a step forward. Sleep through your exams/board meetings/interviews and screw up big time. What better form of destructive escapism!

5. Play the Junkie.

Now this one’s what you’ve dreamed of doing ever since you heard that song Dum Maro Dum. Grab the chance now (not literally though)! Play it up on the impression, while playing it down on the reality factor (that’s what everyone anyway does with the reality these days). Wear hippie attire; don’t comb your hair for what’s like an eon and use those sleepless nights practiced in #4 above, in perfecting that “doped” expression. And then go about telling everyone you’re on dope. Trust me, it’s gonna give you the ultimate kick in life (albeit in the ass, if you’re not careful enough to exclude your parents and the 'Interpol sibling' from that “everyone”)

I think I'm gonna go on and write a book on The 1001 Techniques of Escapism someday. Till then, just keep practicing these simple yet powerful techniques with dedication and you’ll have a guaranteed bright future in the delusional world of escapism.

(Images courtesy - Google)

Sick and Chirpy!

Hey folks!

Okay, I have to admit I've been MIA from my blog for a tad too long. And as much as I hate to own up to it, the thing that compelled me to return to writing today is, well, illness. Yeah. Like most people around me, I am ill right now. Been so for the past few days, intermittently though. Be it common cold, fever, sore throat, sprained ankle, body-aches, over-exertion or bingeing (yes, I consider it a disease in my case), I've been there, done that in the past few days.

So, from great experience do I say, ILLNESS IS NOT GOOD. Neither for the mind nor for the body. It just takes away the joy from life. You may get food served to you in bed, or you may have people fawning over you, asking if you need anything, or you may get to sleep a lot (i absolutely love that part). But you might recall from the very last time that you fell ill - no matter how well you're being treated, you do not seem to enjoy any of it! What's more, you pile up the kilos lying around, and poor brain suffers severe damage working overtime, as you have got nothing to do all day but to think. All you can wish for in such situations is to get well soon. You crave for the sunlight, the chirping of birds, the sounds of wheels rattling on the road and the children playing in the streets. Or not. Maybe then for the hustle-bustle of the metro, a visit to the mall, a shopping spree, a class bunk or a hangout with friends (given that we live in a modern world, not the quintessential one I would rather have wished for). Bottomline - you wanna go out there, but all you get is bedrest and pills.

Come on, it happens with everybody. Working your butt off 24*7 for weeks at end, you end up wishing you'd just fall ill and get some days off to relax. Trust me when I say, that shall never happen. It's almost as if God's off on a vacation or he's outright forgotten he created you. But that's the whole idea behind an illness! It makes a grand appearance right at the time when you most wish it didn't. And that, my friends, is the beauty of His world. Illness brings along with it a deeper message from God. It serves to teach you not to take things for granted in life. Do your work diligently when you're supposed to. And do not wish for things to go as per your whims. Because if you do, you'll end up wishing they hadn't. God knows how to teach his children some great lessons. You'll screw up in no time, wishing you'd never so much as even wished. (well, yes, I've been spending my free time watching movies back to back. This prophetic sermon comes from my watching of a certain movie that might have really been dumb, but it gave rise to the prophet in an otherwise self-proclaimed sadist. Bruce Almighty all the way. :p)

Now for some real-world talk. Some of the things I really hate about being sick:
1. I have a low tolerance to the cold. So I take a blanket to bed when ill, and hence become the butt of everyone's taunts. "We're sweating like hell and rooting for the A.C. while she's cowering in a blanket. " Yeah, right.
2. As I said, illness come at the worst time possible. Holidays are on, and with a jam-packed schedule for the coming week, I hate having to miss anything. A school reunion tomorrow, movie the day after, followed by meeting with a friend who's coming to the city only for a day, and training visit the fourth day, I wonder what'll I be missing. None, God, please! :(
3. The very fact that I'm stranded alone, sick, at home on weekdays with nothing better to indulge in than watching movies and net surfing. Don't even feel like writing most of the time.

Signing off here with an earnest hope to recover ASAP! :)
Take care friends!