A misplaced idea of love

A mistaken sense of belonging

A misplaced idea of love

Is it real, what I perceive as mine?

Who am I? Where do I belong?

Finding comfort in pages and words

Impervious to faces, voices, and noises

Am I estranged from the world?

Or am I lost to my mind?

Here today, gone tomorrow

Transience has been me eternally

Memories plague me, certainty evades me

How long will I live in ivory towers?

A beating heart, a twitching ear

An insomniac's urge to run

They ask, what is out there?

What beckons me to fly?

Flitting between physical spaces

No semblance of ground in sight

Have I left home forever?

Or am I homeward bound?

On the trail of a place under the sun

I've lost track of where I come from

Will anything ever tie me down?

Is there no cornerstone I will find?

And in the wake of every flight

In my heart will I always find

A mistaken sense of belonging

A misplaced idea of love?

© Mahima Kohli 2016

Dusk on the Arabian Sea

Sometimes, just sometimes, you want to be left alone to your thoughts.

Sometimes it's not love you want, but the wondrous sight of dusk at sea. 

In those times, all else seems to stop existing around you.

All that is alive is the sand, the sun, and ripples of the ocean.

Sometimes you don't want to go with the flow, or stand against the tide.

Sometimes, just sometimes, you want to stand by and watch the raging waves.

You want to be swept away by the wind but stay rooted to a speck of the earth.

You want to stop moving and listen to the sounds of what's past and what is to come.

In these moments, you cease to be you and float above

To discover, you are the world, and the world is you.

You are the cool of the breeze and the pink of the setting sun.

You are the salt in the water, the voice of the places you have been.

Stranger tides may have tossed you ashore,

But here you are today.

The water is calling, the sun inviting,

Dive in and find out what lies deep within.

Because in this moment, you are you.

And nobody can take this away from you.

Savour the sensation, for it won't last

Neither will the world, and nor will you.

My first blog Award - better late than never!

I am a bad, bad person. Really bad. Because ages and ages ago (in March last year, to be a little more precise), a pretty (and?) sweet fellow blogger Priya Nain nominated me for the Liebster Award on her blog here. Thank you so much, Priya, for the honour. It was a great feeling to know you'd been following my blog and considered me worthy for the nomination.

And my sincerest apologies too, because I, having been busy with exam after exam ever since that same time, never got the time to acknowledge the award and carry it forward like one is supposed to do when one gets it. I'm probably going to hell for that. But anyhow, to make amends to my sweet nominator Priya and to carry the award forward (no matter how late), I'm going to answer the questions posed by her to me and to nominate a few of my own blogger friends too for the Liebster Award.

The rules, I have reason to believe, keep changing over the course of time as the award passes from one blogger to another across the globe. The rules as I received them are:

1. Write 10 random facts about yourself.
2. Answer the questions posed by nominating blogger.
3. Nominate 11 bloggers with less than 200 followers
4. Write 11 questions for them to answer.

So, I'll get on with it.

10 Random Facts about me:

1. I am a very particular person. I like language to be used in its purest form, I like to see people conform to some basic tenets of etiquette, I like to perform tasks as efficiently as they can be done, I can't see resources/time being wasted, I like to reach places on time and so on. I'm a giant pain in the derriere for almost everyone who knows me. 

2. I don't swear and don't take kindly to people who swear in my presence. Just can't take it.

3. I eat only about 25 things out of the entire range of food items and delicacies that are out there in the world. I just have very specific taste buds, that's all. No fancy reason.

4. I have a tiny appetite. My friends are horrified when they get to know how little I eat on a daily basis. And I have absolutely no patience and respect for the people who assume, just by my size, that I must be a big eater. Going by that logic, I should also assume that the people who are stick thin don't get enough food to eat, isn't it? Some mother of logic, that.

5. I am a psycho freak. I can read your mind, I can complete your sentences and I can make you feel like we're soulmates just by being normal everyday me.

6. I am by turns an obsessive, restless person who cannot sit idle for the love of God, and a lazy-ass sleepyhead who has no idea what she should do so she sleeps, eats, wonders at the complexities of life and watches useless movies. I cannot be anything between the two. 

7. I'm not normal. I just learned this a couple of days ago during a particularly insightful conversation with another not-normal person. They should have a support group for us. Really.

8. I have strong anti-social tendencies. I like to keep to myself mostly, I like to go for walks alone, I'd rather keep to one or two good friends at a time and I look down while walking so I don't have to acknowledge the presence of passing acquaintances.

9. I can't make small talk. And I can't stand it either. You either have something to talk about or you stay silent (and keep the bloody phone down, if it is the phrase 'aur bata' you have to resort to every 30 seconds during a phone conversation.)

10. I love writing and reading and everything that's related. It is what comes naturally to me. Whether I'm ill or sleepy or bored or super busy, if there is one thing I can always do and want to do, it is this. This isn't a fact unknown to anyone, but a list of facts about me is just incomplete without this one facet of my life. Now this list is officially complete.

Now for the questions posed to me:

Q1. Which is your favourite movie and why?

Ans. I don't have a single favourite movie, but I can pick a few for mention's sake. Here's the 3 movies I love the most, and why.

Q2. A career option you would never opt for and why.

Ans. Anything that wouldn't allow me to be myself, to follow my heart, to practise my hobbies and in general anything that would stifle me in any way. A corporate job for instance - long hours, cut-throat competition, greed for money etc. Not my cup of tea. I would only ever fit into a job that gives me immense freedom and personal satisfaction. 

Q3. Is it better to be born rich than to be talented?

Ans. To each his own. Some people just want money, no matter how, and some want to earn it through their work or talents. I'd fall into the second category.

Q4. A book you wish had never ended.
Ans. A Suitable Boy, by Vikram Seth.

Q5. What upsets you the most?
Ans. A lot of things actually. But mostly, the feeling or realization of loneliness.

Q6. What is your greatest phobia?
Ans. To end up unhappy in the long run in life.

Q7. What is the craziest thing you would ever want to try?
Ans. I would rather not reveal my crazy fetishes and thoughts here. Too scandalous for public revelation. :P

Q8. Whats your idea of a perfect weekend?
Ans. It changes with the mood and time. However a sketchy outline I can manage. An active start to the day with a jog and some exercise, maybe some adventure as well. Afternoon coffee alone, with a nice view to look at. Evening spent reading some good book or writing. End with an elaborate but light meal with an interesting person to converse with, or family.

Q9. Why did you start blogging?
Ans. I started this blog in my second semester of Engineering, one night at 2 am, because I was sad/bored/with nothing interesting to do/in awe of a friend who was already a blogger at that time. Basically, like every other thing you do at 2 am in the night, I did it just for the heck of it.

Q10. What is that one line or word that comes to your mind when I say the following:
Rain - Beauty, pleasure and a sense of joy in my heart.
Pizza - Either wood-fired, thin-crust, authentic Italian with olives/mushrooms on top, or bleh.
Books - Lifelong love affair.
Hate - A strong emotion, never use it for anything or anyone, or it''ll come back to you in some or the other form.

Q11. And finally-Vampire Diaries or Prison Break(this question is for TV series freaks like me).
Ans. I haven't watched the second, so can't really say if I'd like it or not. But I most certainly disliked Vampire Diaries the only time I watched it, so Prison Break it would be.

Now for my own list of nominated bloggers:

I don't think I even know 11 bloggers personally, so I'm going to take the liberty to nominate fewer bloggers but only those whom I'd like to see answering my questions and probably wake up from the deep slumber they or their blogs have been in. Let's see how many carry it forward and when (don't get inspired from me, I am a bad influence). Here's the list:

1. Sushmita at My World

2. Amul at Artistic Manifestation Under Legislation

3. Sushmit at Blogwati (Yes, you.)

4. Abhishek at Furobiker

5. Ghata at My World

And now, the 11 Questions I wish to pose to the bloggers I have nominated:

I'd like to pose the same questions to each one of my nominated friends as were posed to me from my nominator. Why? For two reasons.

1. I'm currently in my lazy phase, so I don't wish to exert my brain to come up with creative new questions right at this moment.

2. The questions are pretty much all-encompassing and I'd really like to read my friends' answers to them.

Look forward to your answers!

Time to Act. Finally.

Main bahut pareshan thi. Mujhse koi ladka baat nahi karta tha, mera phone kitne kitne din tak bajta hi nahi tha. Inbox mein bhi sirf MTS customer care ke messages bhare rehte the. Main apni zindagi se bahut dukhi thi.

Phir maine Facebook par account banaya, DP ki jagah ek model ki photo lagayi aur kewl language ka istemaal karna shuru kiya. Ab main sirf Yo, Frenzzz, Guyzzz and galzzzz ka use karti thi. Log mujhse baat karne lage. Ladke mujhe fraandship requests bhejne lage, aur to aur mere last status par 52 likes bhi aye the. Main bahut achha mehsus kar rhi hu. All thanks to Facebook! (y)

*

The rest of the post has almost nothing to do with those opening lines (which you have to admit you read in that exact tone.) Except for one lesson that I learnt from this otherwise nonsensical monologue of an obviously desperate girl: the importance of taking things into your own hands in order to bring significant changes into your life.

I've been in a rut these past few weeks. Nothing seems to be going right. I feel alienated. I've been lazy, laidback, morose, occasionally even sad enough to be considered depressed. My productive output has dropped to drastically low levels. And try as I may, I haven't been able to snap out of this state of limbo for weeks.

However, something just sporadically occurred to me today. You see, there's a simple explanation for this state of mine, which for some reason had been eluding me all this while. But it is clear as crystal to me now. I have involuntarily been in a self-destruct phase for a couple of months. I am a restless and energetic person by default - sitting in a place without productive activity for long makes me morose and lazy, which in turn makes me sick. It becomes a vicious circle from there - no productive activity --> sickness --> too much sleep --> laziness --> no productive activity - and so on and on it proceeds.

I think I need to do something really productive with my life, something I absolutely like doing or want to do. That way I would do some constructive work, while also keeping my mind off depressing things and keeping it all healthy and active. It should probably help me focus better on my studies too. What a brainwave! No wonder it never occurred to me for so long. I was just so busy being sick and lazy!

This is however no magic pill. It is just an effort I need to make in order to turn my life around, maybe pamper and pep myself up a bit. I was living in a shell all this time, cut off from my real world, isolated from all things that inspire me. In the field I am pursuing, it is said that the lesser number of distractions and interests you have, the better it is for your success. I think I let this perception get to my head. I completely stopped doing the things that I absolutely love doing - the only 3 things that have always given me pure joy - reading, writing and travelling.

I've had so much to write about that my blog dashboard is flooded with draft posts that never see the light of day. I also stopped taking up freelance work, so no money's been coming in and I've been scraping off of my parents for so many months (*hangs head in shame*). I've also stopped reading - after 22 entire years spent reading novels left right and centre, even in exams, on trips and in isolated corners of cafes! I feel horrible all of a sudden. I picked up Narcopolis during my Bombay trip in January, but a few tens of pages into it, I chucked it into some godforsaken corner of my bookshelf. Then followed The Lowland, only to meet the same fate. My bookshelf is overflowing with the most wonderful books, all lying there biting dust. And I haven't looked at them in ages. I'm a terrible, terrible person. No, I really am.

The travelling bit is a little trickier than that. Study schedules and health issues, as well as the lack of companionship, prevent me from hanging out or visiting places of my interest much. It's a very sad life, what these (us) civil service aspirants lead. But for better or for worse, I have very willingly and passionately chosen this field for myself and will (have to) see it through to the end, no matter how I manage to do that.

One might wonder what I do in my spare time, though, since my studies have obviously not been going well, and I am not pursuing any of my favourite activities either. Well, I guess confessions are in order tonight! So here it is - I utilize most of my spare time either playing card games in my phone, watching movies and TV serial reruns on the laptop or reading Thought Catalog (and related) articles on the Web. It's an utter waste of time, I know. But realizations don't always come in time. I realize now, what a toll my stupid lazy-ass habits have been taking on my physical and mental health. It is an addiction, all of this - games, Internet surfing and movie watching. It sucks you into its warp so hard that you cannot muster the resolve to get out of it and onto your own feet. It cripples you and lets all your creative potential go to waste.

But not anymore. Things are about to change.

(NOTE: I had gone to bed about 2 hours ago. But these thoughts kept me awake, and all of a sudden I jumped out of bed and opened the laptop to write it all down before it conveniently slips my mind tomorrow morning and I fall back into this horrible, life-wrecking rut again.)

So friends, Romans and countrymen, lend me your ears!

For I have resolved, with effect from tonight, that I shall not watch any more movies or TV serial reruns, no matter how free or bored I am. If I do happen to get lured towards the Movies folder, I shall take the drastic step of actually deleting the folder or transferring it to an external hard drive. (Na rahega baans, na bajegi bansuri :D) I shall restrict my freecell-playing and article-reading hobbies to a bare minimum, and intersperse them between studies and other activities. Whenever I am bored or tired of studying, I shall either go for a walk or indulge in some light exercises. Most importantly, I shall devote my leisure hours to reading all of those amazing books I have stacked over the months. I also resolve to clear out all those drafts from my blogger homepage, by completing and posting them here after all. A much-needed boost to my dwindling blog activity and a creative boost to my starved mind. Two birds with one arrow, FTW!

I am also starting my freelance work again, so you will soon be seeing my posts on a well-known travel-related website (more on that, later). The creative juices are all ready and raring to flow again. I just really really wish this adrenaline rush lasts just enough time to get me started on all these life-altering lifestyle changes, before sickness takes over my body and mind again.

Until then, ciao folks, and do keep the encouraging comments coming in. They make my life just that teeny bit better, and much much happier. \(^_^)/

November's Here Again

The month of love, happiness and cheer is finally here again. You might remember my talking about it with a lot of gusto last year. In fact that one's by far my most read post till date (refer to the side panel on the right for proof). That just indicates the fact that people, no matter where they live or what they do, definitely dig happiness in life. Everyone wants to be happy, to be made to smile, to have some reason to remain joyful every day of the year. Again, who wouldn't!

But it's been a year since that post. And like I've been reiterating a lot lately,

To some, a year is just another sixtieth of an entire lifetime.
To others, it's an entire lifetime in itself.

You would've guessed by now that this November I am not excited. Nothing's able to make my innards jump up with joy these days. Or weeks. Or was it months? Anyhow. I've learned a lot over these past few months. Still learning in fact. I'm learning the various avails of independence - emotional and professional - in making you a better, more self-aware person. I'm learning tolerance and total submission to the wildest wills of God. I'm getting used to the inconsistency and instability of life and its various aspects. Nothing's permanent. Things change a lot over time. And if one isn't able to deal with the changes, what did one really achieve in life, right?

It isn't like November hasn't come with enough causes of happiness to me. I just landed a job today. I've been traveling a lot lately, and another couple of trips are lined up in the near future. I also have ample stuff to write about, and am in talks with a magazine for an editor and a writer's job. My engineering is finally coming to an end in another few months. Life is gradually but steadily transitioning into one I have no premonition of. I should be excited, or afraid, or sad, or anxious of what's gonna happen. I am not. I'm more or less blank, regarding the present and what the future holds for me. Life never goes the way you most expect it to, then why even bother to have any expectations?

'Go with the flow' has always been my mantra in life. Let things happen to you. Get lost somewhere, make a lot of mistakes, do things you aren't proud of, learn from experiences, let time heal wounds and let your imagination run wild. But never regret anything in life. Enjoy every phase of it. And I guess that's what I'm really trying to do right now. Trying hard to adjust to things, to accept some changes and to be happy. But trying too hard never came with good results. I need to let go at some point, I've realized. Need to 'go with the flow' like I always do. I'm thinking too much, smiling too less. I'm giving leverage to people who don't really deserve it, thinking about things that shouldn't bog me down as much as they do. I need to liven up. Question is, how.

I don't expect an answer to it though. I know I'll figure it out soon enough. November's always been MY month. It sort of defines me, my life and my temperament. It cannot stay outside of me for long. And it has just begun. I'm sure things will look up, and I'll be back with a super-happy, super-excited post very soon. Come on, show your magic, November dear!

P.S. All opinions expressed above are a result of the innermost workings of my twisted mind. And exams are on, so my logic is anyway contorted due to an overload of information bytes and severe nerve fiber congestion. Do NOT attempt to read between the lines or ask me anything about it. Just wait for the sun to shine bright outside my window someday soon. Because for now, there's nothing but cold November rain.

Weird instance of my sadistic humor!

I can be a real bad ass sometimes. Or a tease, or just really goofy - whatever it is you'd choose to call me after reading this post.

So around this very same time last year, I came across this wonderful blog that I thoroughly enjoyed reading. The guy does write well (at least he did back then, since I haven't read his recent blog posts) and the blog was very interesting. But then something happened and my mind took a totally sadistic turn. It was nothing much really, I just happened to stumble upon a page on the blog that said 'Would love to know you:)'. Check it out, you!

Just one look at this page was enough to turn on that goofy button inside my head that turns me into a real troll. And so I set upon writing him some 'feedback'. I don't know how I came about writing all that stuff I did. Let's just say I was in exceptionally high spirits that night. Or maybe I was just high.
;)

Dude, your blog is great. I happened to drop by your blog as a result of a random visit to blogjunta, though God knows why I went there in the first place. The blog layout, the theme and the way you've described yourself and your "vows" were what caught my eye and made me stay and browse, more than your so-called "weird, supposedly humorous" new post. :P
Well...the post was very nicely written and that gives me an idea of how well you must write. I'll surely come back tomorrow to read more, as it's a little late right now and my eyes are drooping. Not that I sleep early or anything, but maybe I saw something that kinda made me sleepy. Which reminds me of the post which I was talking about. It was, as I said, nicely written. And the ending kinda made me think, "was this for what I read through this whole page?" But anyway, I'd like to read more posts to know more and be able to bug you more through this "feedback form". Wow, I love the concept. For now, goodnight and have a great day, maybe until you read this "feedback".

P.S. I took the pain to write so much in order to help realize your inner hopes/dreams/expectations of receiving lots of feedback through this simple form that you've painstakingly installed on your lovely blog. And I included those quirky and unnecessary details because you said above that one could write to you just about anything in or out of this planet. So I just felt like writing something. Not knowing what to write about except for praise for your blog, which I hope I have made very clear by now, I wrote anything and everything that came to my mind. Hope you don't mind. We're bloggers, and by that relation, fellows of the same fraternity on the internet, and so we have a certain responsibility towards each other. You getting me I hope.

Anyway, now I really can't stay awake any longer. Your profile might end up remaining open on my screen and I might fall asleep onto the keyboard. I wouldn't like that at all. Would you? I hope not.

I wish you read this feedback-cum-introductory-cum-friendly-banter letter with some patience and certainly not a hot head. And I hope you haven't reached hell and so, can reply. I'll be waiting. :)

You might as well visit my blog too, only if you wish to, that is. There isn't any elaborate response/feedback form that I provide there, but you may mail me at my email ID. I'd love to reply and get talking. You're kinda handsome too, BTW. ;)
Now again...goodnight!

That's it. that's just it. Every time I read it, I cannot help but wonder at what weird twist of my mind it could've been that made me write all that. That too to some innocent fellow blogger who must've put up that feedback form on his blog with a totally different intention altogether, maybe not even expecting someone to actually write to him through it. But the guy was a sport. He replied back through email, and in fact seemed really happy to have received my feedback! :P He even flirted a little. It was a fun little conversation we had on email. Now that I look back upon it, I find it an amazingly fun experience. Don't know what else to say about it. Cheers to my occasional weirdness that sometimes turns into awesomeness! :D

From the writer's bookshelf...

Isn't the feel of a brand new book in your hands like the best feeling ever? *sigh*

So I finally caught hold of Narcopolis. Yes, I mean the book by Indian poet and writer Jeet Thayil that has been shortlisted along with 5 other world-class titles for this year's Man Booker Prize. *yayyy* You see, I have this fetish for Indian Booker prize winner books. The White Tiger, Midnight's Children, The God of Small Things, The Inheritance of Loss - you name it and I've read it. This one was gonna be no exception then, was it? I am very (VERY) eager to read it.

Though I am currently feasting my senses (literally!) on Shantaram by Gregory David Roberts. Now I don't say this often, with only about a handful of books that have ever had a profound, lasting effect on me, but this book is so going on to my list of favorites. It isn't even a book in the true sense - it's a phenomenon. I could just go on and on about how amazing, thought-provoking and at times really heart-wrenching Shantaram is. But I shall reserve any further of my praises for it until I finish reading. A review will hopefully be up here by the end of next week.

Other few of my latest literary acquisitions - on my to-read list in the coming weeks - are an assortment of my varied interests. For example, The Laws of the Spirit World by Khorshed Bhavnagiri is a book that describes the spiritual journey of an elderly Parsi couple who lose both of their young sons and are devastated, until they see the true spiritual path towards redemption. The Krishna Key, by Ashwin Sanghi, on the other hand is an expression of my recently acquired love for Indian historical fiction. And who better than Ashwin Sanghi to do justice to the genre! I've read his Chanakya's Chant, and parts of The Rosabal Line as well, and have high expectations of his latest title. So keep watching this space for reviews and a lot more on books!

Also, in another, totally unrelated news, I'm leaving for Jaipur tomorrow to attend a cousin's wedding over the weekend. And I found myself wondering - Jaipur, Udaipur and other such cities in Rajasthan have in recent times become a favorite choice for couples to get married in. Why is that? Is it really because of the exotic forts and gardens that they offer for the wedding location - the ceremonial venues that seem to have been taken right out of the pages of Indian history? OR! Is it because wedding arrangements, venues and catering are much less expensive there than they are in Delhi? Do tell me if any one of you has figured this out already. :P

Rebirth

I walk by an empty room sometimes
And my mind sinks into memories bygone...

Of those walls that had no windows or door,
Of that damp corner where I'd always crouch
Look up at the blackened ceiling above
While an untold sorrow weighed my heart

The walls seemed to close in on me
The face in the wall a mere shadow

And the shrieks froze inside my throat
As I cowered in wait of an evident end

But the walls caved in the moment I blinked
To reveal a lovely sun shining in their wake
It warmed and fed a soul long stifled
And turned fright into ethereal epiphany

And that bright sun still livens up my life,
Warming my days, lighting up my nights
Passing by an empty room reminds me sometimes
Of how lifeless i was and how I came to life...

Jump, JUMP!

This post was gonna be about something else. Something totally different, trust me. But then I started listening to this particular song on loop and it is stuck in my head just so bad that I have to share it with you all before I can proceed further to more important stuff in the following posts.

Jump jump.. Kriss Kross will make ya.. Jump, JUMP!

Does it strike a chord somewhere? Oh yeah it is the 1990s superhit song Jump, by the American rapper duo Kriss Kross comprising of those two kids with similar names that were sort of reversible. The duo's trademark was the fact that they wore their over sized clothes backwards (Beat that Eminem!)


This song is just so addictive, I've literally been listening to it on continuous loop for like ever now. Okay, maybe just about half an hour. But it makes me wanna go all hip-hop and start dancing on the bed. THAT good. Check it out.



Doesn't it make you wanna jump too? And the fact that it's just two little boys singing it makes it so much more fun! Though everyone certainly might not like it. I'm just weird sometimes in my choice of songs. But it's a complete party song. The Mac Dad will make ya, Jump JUMP! :D

(Download the mp3 here if you like it)

Know of any more such songs that make you wanna jump? Let me know!

Writers can troll too!

Apparently, trolling is fast becoming a trend within the published writers' community too. Many modern Indian writers are taking digs at people in their books these days (don't know about foreign writers). I was reading this book The Secret of the Nagas by Amish Tripathi the other day, and as I turned to page 186 and read it through, I was really in splits for a good five minutes. Wondering what was it I saw?? Take a look:

Isn't it just too obvious how the writer intends to pun Bappi da?! I couldn't help but be surprised at the sheer unexpectedness of such a thing from a book like that, which is set in such an ancient time and is mostly fiction. I mean, seriously? From rage comics on the internet to real life practice to the published word as well, trolling has indeed come a long way. I never thought I'd ever include any rage comic stuff on my blog, but as it turns out, things don't always take the course you expect them to take in life. (I must admit though, it's real fun to read rage comics *religious follower* xD)

Nothing more from my side for now. So till I write again, keep trolling!

The Joys of Nature at My Doorstep

Having a room right next to a garden is like living right in the middle of the garden itself. If there's shade outside, it'll usually be pleasant inside on an otherwise bright sunny day. When it's raining, you hear the rain drops falling on the window pane and the wind howling through the leaves. Would you believe if I said I haven't had much cause to switch on the ceiling fan of my room for the past few days? And at the onset of the dreaded annual event called the Delhi summers, yes sire. The weather outside is just so beautiful and pleasant right now, with all those strong gusty winds filtering right through my window over to where I squat on my bed - I don't have better fitting words to describe the feeling. I figure I'll just make do by describing the delight that living next to a planted backyard/lawn/garden can be.


Though I wouldn't exactly call it a well manicured lawn or a beautiful garden per se, but it was more of a savanna grassland with rocks and shoulder high weeds, garbage and mud (not even soil) strewn around everywhere before we moved in. So I'd daresay we've made good progress. The grasses are growing well, hedges have been planted, and the mango trees are showering little mango-babies all over the place with every gust of wind. The banana bore fruit, we did not care to climb that high to take it down, so it wilted. The guava was, well, not in the best of its health when we came. But it has been treated sufficiently well for it to give such a beautiful silhouette against the blue skies.

The blue blue sky through the green leafy foliage. My idea of a delightful sight.

Ooo..that is just the friendly neighborhood crow. Drops in every now and then to say hello. Though mostly when I'm trying hard to study.

The mango in full bloom. These flowers have long given way to fruit. Mangoes! :D

And that's the humble banana patch. Quite in a mess, but fruiting nevertheless.

Spot the bananas if you can! :P

One of the cute little yellow and orange flowers we've planted. And no, they're not Marigolds.

I often wake up at (or stay up till) six in the morning to the extra loud, distinct chirps of at least five different birds outside, each perfectly in synch with all others. The sunlight of the early morning is actually invigorating. And I've even noticed a trend. Ever since I started sleeping with my head right under the window, I've been waking up early, at my will, and I feel fresher than ever every morning. And this isn't even the placebo effect. Waking up to sunlight streaming into your room certainly makes the day brighter and more cheerful. It's like having my own sureshot fix to untimely blues. Ah...if only I could have my morning light with me all day long.

Aren't things really getting beautiful around here? Or maybe it's just me, having got a personal garden for the first time in my life. It feels good. Really, I've always wanted one my entire existence. And to be able to really enjoy such a fantastic weather as this in a city like mine, a haven like this is all it takes. But like I've said before, wishes do get fulfilled, and how!

Busy days!

Life's hectic. I have been busy. And not the I-was-busy-so-went-missing-from-my-blog kind of busy. I really don't know when one day turns into night, and the sun shines into my bedroom window and then goes back down again the next night. It is all muddled nowadays. I almost never remember what date of the month I am living in. I somehow determine what day of the week it is by going through my schedule for the day. Haven't attended college for exactly one week now, what with Holi mass bunk and my own tiredness. Not sure if I remember what one is supposed to do there. So exhausted and drained out.

A lot is going on in life. I've started working out. Stretching, slow jogging, sharpening my long-lost Badminton skills. Takes up my evenings, twice or thrice a week. Other days it's just planning, shopping for and cleaning up the new house. Alright, it's pretty old now, given the three months since we moved in. But the final shifting of furniture and other important stuff was finished just about a week ago, so can say it is relatively new again. My days comprise of clearing out cartons and bags of clothes and filling out closets with them, setting up my books in someplace I can never find them, thinking of which cupboard or rack would go where, what color of pillow covers and doormat will suit which room, what kind of table would suit the sofa...you get the drift. Spent the whole weekend scrounging for lampshades, curtains, upholstery and furniture across the length and breadth of the city. Colors, shades, angles, measurements - that is all that my mind AND my vocab seem to be filled with as I try hard to think. I'm going crazy.

But it is satisfying at the end of the day to know that you haven't left a single stone unturned in getting the best of everything to adorn your house. And to know that your opinion even as a twenty year old, believed-to-be-low-on-common-sense lost-in-her-own-world kinda girl, counts a lot in all important matters. It is a huge confidence boost for me. Plus the pleasure of finally getting to have my own INDIVIDUAL room and setting it up the way I want. Whoever said a busy life can't be exciting?

But there's so much pending stuff to do. College files, professional commitments (I am partner in a promising upcoming startup firm, more on which later), and my writing. I just have so much to write about! I've come up with as much as five different topics to blog about in the last one week. Just can't squeeze in the time. Hope to be able to find some more time for myself in the coming days, with the process of finally settling in almost underway. I'll be back with better(read:readable) stuff soon. Stay tuned!

Random Blabberings

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I don't have any particular agenda for writing this post. Just had some things on my mind that I wanted to write down. Quite unrelated but significant thoughts that needed an outlet. And so I've put them down here, conveniently in bullet form. :D

1. I forgot my own guest post.
Yeah, the one that I talked about here. And yes, I forgot to tell MY OWN readers that I did finally manage to write it and it got published here some two weeks ago. That was pretty silly and careless of me. I don't even know how I skipped it. Blast! Nothing's lost yet though. You can still read the post now. :)


2. The Hugh Syndrome
So, like it earlier happened with Afghanistan, my life's at it again. This time it's the name Hugh following me. It has just been appearing in front of me far too frequently for some time. It all started with my falling in love with the actor Hugh Grant, I suppose I've mentioned him more than once in earlier posts. :D
Then I happened to take a liking to another actor after watching a certain movie of his. Hugh Dancy that was. Then came in Hugh #3, Mr. Hugh Jackman, the Wolverine and more recently the Real Steel guy. I really truly have the hots for him. But then comes another Hugh, this time in the form of Dr. Gregory House from the TV series House MD. I am currently OD-ing on this medical drama, easily watching 3 episodes a day, that amounts to over 2 hours of my precious time everyday. But the point here is, the doctor in question, Dr. House, is played by a brilliant actor Hugh Laurie. Intense acting, fabulous sarcasm, highly irritating to everyone around him. Jussst perfect! :D So there we have Hugh #4. Now that's a lot of Hughs to keep track of. Not that I mind much. As I said, just had to write it all down. Anyone reading this would surely be all *facepalm* right now. :P

3. My fiction writing
I've been actively dabbling in fiction stories these days. Now that is how things go with me. For months at end I won't be able to churn out even a bunch of sensible lines, and then suddenly I'll feel inspired and end up taking up old stories I had left unfinished and completing them, only to move on to new ideas. I received predominantly positive reviews for my story Eyes to my Soul and its sequel. The subsequent parts of the story are in the pipeline, as is another story that I am presently thinking of. And I need honest and critical reviews for my stories so as to help me do better. Toh Sun lo saare aalsi people, I need comments! :P

4. The Random End
A random post calls for a random ending, doesn't it? So I'll just end with a picture a friend once mailed to me when we used to be all gaga about the TV shows FRIENDS and How I Met Your Mother. It is sort of funny. And quite random in itself. Just what I needed to make this post my randomest ever. :P

Call me Particular if you may!

I've been itching to write on this particular topic for a very long time. Which topic? And why particularly this topic? Well, the answer lies in the question itself. Particularity. I am very particular about some things in life. Very, as in VERY particular. Some of the things that might even make me come across as a freak to some. Just felt like writing all this down today. I don't force you to read anyway. Read if you have enough time to throw away.

1. The K Syndrome

People have this extremely annoying tendency to use "k" very frequently. Be it in text messages or on chat, the K syndrome is just plain frustrating. Add to it the SMS lingo that has been trending for the last few years. No words could possibly bring out my true hatred for it. People use it with such confidence and pride that it makes me wonder what's there to be so happy about in using such insanely shortened words? Isn't it really a mask to hide your poor spellings? And there is no consistency even in the kind of abbreviations people nowadays tend to employ. I mean, okay, abbreviations can still be justified if you don't like to type a lot. But how can you justify using mah for my? What kind of abbreviation technique is THAT?

I don't mean to offend anybody, especially none of those who are reading this right now. But It's just a personal fixation. Even I have used this SMS lingo earlier, I admit, but never shortened words more than where necessary, and then gradually left it completely. Kindly excuse me if I sound bigoted.

2. Murder of Grammar

I am very particular about the correct usage of language, be it English or for that matter Hindi or any other languages I may know. It just doesn't escape my notice if a person in front of me makes even a single trivial mistake in spoken or written language. And no, I don't embarrass people by pointing it out or correcting them publicly. That is just not me. But I feel weird inside. Not irritated as such, if the mistakes are genuine or sometimes innocent. But if you don't care to actually know the language and still love to use it, well, I don't have the right words for you. Just that, it's nothing short of purposeful murder that you're committing. Murder of language, of grammar, of my patience, and of your impression on me.

3. Value of Commitment

I value commitment. And I value people who value their commitments. I respect such people a lot. The whole point of 'committing' to something or someone is to actually carry out what you promise. If you can't, or don't really plan to do something, then why pray commit? Just to appear nice or give out a 'cool' impression? It doesn't work, at least not with me. I don't promise anything to anyone unless and until I know I shall do it. And if I do commit, I fulfill my promises to my best ability. Just another personal fixation you can say.

4. Over-Familiar People

People sometimes try to be overtly familiar or friendly towards yours truly. And to put it very subtly, I DON'T LIKE IT. I say, why pretend to be my best friend if you're really not? You don't even know me as much as you think. And here's the catch - I wouldn't mind it so much if it were to be just about a few friends. But it happens a lot nowadays! It's insane. I am not an unfriendly person, and you would know that well. But come on, isn't a person entitled to some unbreached privacy?

5. Save the Environment

I am one hell of a freak when it comes to pro-nature activities. I switch off the lights and close the taps when they're not needed. I NEVER throw stuff on the roadsides or the wrong places. If you don't like littered environs then why litter them at all? But folks just don't realize this. Even as a kid I used to keep toffee wrappers and other such stuff in my bag to throw them as and when I spotted a dustbin. And I do that till date. I even refrain my friends from doing such acts when around me - I take their wrappers away too. Little acts that go a long way in saving the environment, and making me feel good, inside.

6. Gifting Etiquette

People should really think ten times before gifting anyone anything. Are recycled show pieces and deodorants worthy enough to be gifted to friends or relatives? Weren't gifts originally meant to show appreciation for some act, or love or liking for someone? I always thought they were. Heaven knows why people don't realize that it isn't necessary to complete the formality of giving presents on birthdays and special days! Unless you really put some thought or effort in procuring the right gift for someone, the practice of exchanging presents is futile. I personally like to hand-pick presents for my loved ones. And no matter how weird or nonsensical a gift might be, I don't recycle my gifts. I like to keep them close.

7. Spreading smiles

I love to smile. Actually, the tooth-baring smile is more my thing. And I make it a point to smile at people as much as I can. Although I'm not a saint - I do not usually smile at people who are openly hostile towards me. No, wait, I sometimes even do that. But I'm working on it. There shall certainly be a day when all you can ever find me doing is smile - when I'm happy, sad, angry, frustrated, anything! How I'd love to do that - it'll surely spread a lot of goodwill in my vicinity. And I believe people look their best when they're smiling. And they stay healthier if they're happy. So for a beautiful and healthy society, I suggest everyone to smile more, and shun anger and sadness. They never pay, but happiness does, in more ways than you can fathom!

See - a picture is worth a thousand words indeed. You stand out in a crowd of random people if a smile adorns your lips. Time to take the cue, and SMILE! :)